But, it’s my birfday


“You’re pathetic.”

“Yeah, I know,” I sullenly agreed.

Debbie had spent the better part of a half an hour trying to help me figure out where I could go tomorrow for my birthday. She did her best, throwing out original ideas for day trips that would get me away from my usual routine. Nothing sounded appealing. Especially in the rain. I was getting pouty.

“Well, fine. Sit and pout for all I care. I can’t stop the rain.”

“But, it’s my birfday.” I childishly argued, hoping I could somehow garner some sympathy.

“Yeah, that sucks for you.”

I had had my heart set on going to the Chinatown Flower Festival on Saturday. With all the gloom and the rain we have been having, a flower festival sounded really lovely. Plus, I’ve been having a hankering to go to Chinatown for a while now. So, I got quite attached to the idea and was really looking forward to it. But, now that rain was in the forecast, it looked like that idea was not going to happen.

On my way home from work I felt this really strong craving to visit someplace exotic. The craving was very strong, bordering on obsession. A visit to an Indian or Mexican grocery store might satisfy it, but they would probably be closed. I wanted to go to a bazaar and pick up exotic, yet cheap little items. I wanted to be someplace other than where I was.

I recognized this as mere craving. So, I watched it arise, curious about its origins. It seemingly came out of nowhere. But did it? Maybe it was this expectation that my birthday is an inherently special day, especially when it falls on a Saturday. The same old same old simply won’t do. Boy, was I setting myself up for disappointment.

Even though I couldn’t satisfy this craving, I didn’t want to go directly home, so I stopped at Border’s to buy some blank cards, and maybe a nice pen. My childhood friend Carol had to put her cat down the other day, so I thought I’d get her a card, as well as one for my cousin Vicki whose husband lost his battle with cancer. Thinking about their losses, as well as my brother’s health situation, I slowly started to feel my own head emerge from my ass. The craving for the exotic was disappearing.

So, today, the boyfriend and I will get in my newly legal car and head south. I’ve never been to San Juan Bautista, and maybe we’ll make a stop at the Rosicrucian Museum in San Jose. Sure, it’s not Mexico or Indian, or even a Cost Plus World Market, but I think I’ll just enjoy my rainy birthday, happy to be alive and healthy.


11 responses »

  1. Glad to hear you eventually got it all in the proper perspective. Sounds like you lazy buddhists take your time getting where you’re going, but it’s the right place when you arrive.
    *impish smile*

  2. Happy Birthday (yesterday)! Hope you did have a great day and enjoy life. It’s a good thing. I used to be annoyed by my birthday because I hate the attention that tends to come with it. After loosing a few people in my life that I know would give anything to have had another birthday feeling well and appreciating being here on earth, I have changed my view. I still don’t enjoy the attention, but I tolerate it and celebrate that I’m here and all the good that this life brings me. There is so much to be grateful for and birthdays are a great day to pay particular tribute to that. Have a great new year!

  3. Thanks all for the birthday wishes. The day did turn out to be a bit of a dud. We got a very late start, it rained all day, and traffic was horrible. But, we got through it with no one getting injured. 🙂

  4. Happy Birthday.

    Mine comes up Sunday (10th). I will have to spend it at FP. My centre has a 3 strikes and you’re out forever and ever policy, and I’m on 2.

  5. My birthday was yesterday, Feb 7. I felt lucky it was on Losar this year. And Happy Birthday to you, a few days ago.

    Hey, we have a lot in common. I just went to Dakini temple for the first time, we have close birthdays, I live in the east bay not far from Pt Richmond, I’m middle aged, practicing Tibetan Buddhist … we should chat some time.

  6. Ditto on what Padma said, though Geography is a major obstacle. Today is my last day in my 30s, so I guess I’m middle-aged too.

  7. David – I didn’t know about Jascha Heifetz and I sharing a birthday, but I do know that other Groundhogs include Farrah Fawcett, James Joyce, Ayn Rand and Tommy Smothers (and both Sid Vicious and Gene Kelly died on 2/2).

    Ron – Gee, you and my dad share a b-day (as well as with Greg Norman and Laura Dern). Happy b-day! I really don’t know the mark of being “middle-aged” anymore. According to the OED, middle age doesn’t hit until 45, so you’ll be excused for any youthful indescretions until then. 😉

    Welcome Padma. And happy birthday to you too! Perhaps we can meet up at the Dakini Temple sometime.

    It’s amazing, I have such an affinity for people born in February (Aquarii, I suppose). In addition to my own birthday, my father’s birthday, I have been romantically involved with men born on the 12th, 13th and 14th of February. Plus, many of my colleagues at work also share a February birthday. Too bad it’s such a miserable month weather-wise.

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